Your child 3-5 years

Sexuality: the first ones why

Sexuality: the first ones why

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To build and move forward, the young child needs to confront reality. However, when issues emerge, especially those related to sexuality, the answers do not always appear as simple to bring. How to react ? What to say ? The explanations of Elodie Gabriel, psychologist for young children and their parents.

But why all these questions?

  • "Why, me, of zizi, I do not have any?", "Why, me, I have no breasts?" ... It is that after having seen you several times, his father and you, in your simplest device, your child asks you "Why, me, it's not the same?"
  • According to Freud, between the age of 2 and 3 years, the child begins a stage of its development, the phallic stage, during which he becomes aware that there are different sexes, explains Elodie Gabriel. The little boys see that they have a penis, though not much like their daddy, while little girls do not have a penis and do not even have breasts like their mom. All this obviously questions the children, says the psychologist. "
  • So, they ask questions! If some answers can be simple and factual: "You do not have zizi because you're a girl, it's the boys who have!", It may get worse when you have to explain to your little boy why " his zizi to him is smaller and does not have the same hairs as that of dad! "
  • "When the child thus questions the" things of life ", in fact, the real question revolves around his life: where does he come from? Who is he among the others? What counts is to refocus the child at the heart of the question, to answer him from his point of view, says Elodie Gabriel.
  • That reassures him to learn that it is normal not to have hair or breasts and that when he grows up, his body will transform and look like his dad's or his mom's. ", adds the psychologist.

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